Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Diamonds on the floor
Accountability. Ew. Sometimes I just don't want to hear it! My prayer/accountability partner, Gail Mashburn nails me with conviction a lot. Our prayer time Monday night was very revealing...sweet, convicting and today...welcoming.
I've had a lingering major prayer request that I cannot even utter. Only two people in the whole world know about this request. Gail who is my current prayer partner and my beloved friend, Denise Prudhomme. It has weighed heavy on me for almost two years. Last night while praying with Gail, (and emailing, calling and texting my friend Denise) I realized I needed to let go of the burden, quit praying that God would work it out my way and just give it to Him.
And Gail said, "That what I have been praying for you for over a year now."
Okay...so I'm slow.
I just wanted to fix things by praying and letting God know the way I thought it should be fixed. Last night in tears and true agony, I gave it up...and my prayer/accountability partner was right beside me crying too. I quote a line from a song... "she started crying...I didn't know what to do...so I sat there and I cried too"--teardrops as diamonds on the floor. That's my sweet friends. Their teardrops with/for me are like precious diamonds.
Just one more stepping stone of faith. Giving up my wants and needs and asking God for His.
It has been some kind of struggle. A faith builder. Now that I've let go... God can work.
Just got this devotional today...which seems confirmation of what I have released. I love it when God reassures us that we are walking the way He wants us to walk.
From Our Father's Heart
Guard your heart!
There is an onslaught of deception
that has been loosed in this world,
and you need to be able to discern truth.
Your ability to overcome the deception that is prevalent,
and that which is to come,
will be directly related to how much you devote yourself to Me
and how much My Word reigns in your heart.
You will have little power to see
if I am not allowed to see for you.
You will be deceived by what is spoken
if My Word and My Holy Spirit do not filter truth from error for you.
Beginning now, you must find all the areas in your life
that do not belong to Me,
those areas that have not been put under My Lordship.
These are areas that you have been functioning in
with your own wisdom, strength, and power.
They are the most vulnerable to the enemy.
These areas are susceptible to deception, confusion, and folly.
Great harm will soon come to you
through these breaches in your spiritual hedge
if they have not been given to Me.
Find where you are functioning in your own gifts and abilities.
Find where you are so comfortable that you do not need Me.
Surrender your most minute sins,
your smallest indiscretions, your bits of judgment,
your wandering thoughts.
Repent of them.
Give them to Me.
Let My Holy Spirit show you what they are
and submit them to My Word so that you will be safe.
Holding on to them is not wise.
In fact, if you choose to harbor them in your heart,
they will soon take you places
that are not safe for you to be.
I am not in those places.
You really do not want to go there.
Isaiah 30:21-22 NIV Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it."
22) Then you will defile your idols overlaid with silver and your images covered with gold; you will throw them away like a menstrual cloth and say to them, "Away with you!"
Mark 4:24 AMP And He said to them, Be careful what you are hearing. The measure [of thought and study] you give [to the truth you hear] will be the measure [of virtue and knowledge] that comes back to you - and more [besides] will be given to you who hear.
If we disobey any of the physical laws, we naturally pay the consequences. If you stick your hand into a fire, you will get burned. If you jump off a building, gravity will do its job. You will land hard, possibly hard enough to kill you.
There are consequences to us if we violate the laws of society. If we break them, we pay the penalty.
Why is it that we pay so little attention to the directions that have been provided for us in God's Word? Following the Lord would seem to be the wisest course of action we could ever take. In fact, throughout the Word it says that if we do not follow Him, our lives will be out of order. Almost on a regular basis, we deviate from those cautions, hedge on our commitment, discard His warnings; and then wonder why our lives are out of order. It really makes little sense.
When I remember how out-of-line my life was when I didn't follow the Word and its directions, even after I came to the Lord, I realize how much more difficult it will be to do so as times get more deceptive. I won't have a chance unless I determine in my heart to take His cautions very seriously and then follow through to the point of complete submission to Him in every area of my life.
Needing His power to even start,